When did life get so busy? Between my 9:00 to 5:00 during the week, my side gig on the weekends, planning a wedding for 250 guests, spending time with my fiance, family, and friends, I find myself neglecting things that I wish I didn’t. For example, laundry (our washer has been broken for a month now, but we’ve been able to make time to find other arrangements), other household chores, my blog that I would love to get up and running again, groups I would love to join and be active in, etc. Everything just starts piling up (kind of like my laundry) and sometimes I have to remember to take time for myself.
Last week, both my fiance and I had a stomach bug. Not only was the timing really bad, but we both felt absolutely awful. Getting sick is a nice reminder to slow down, your body is physically telling you that you need to slow down. But when my body slows down, my anxiety gets the best of me and the guilt sets in for missing certain obligations. I’ve missed a lot of work this year because I’ve experienced major pain flare-ups throughout the year and honestly my anxiety has been really high because of it. I love my job and I hate feeling like I’m letting people down because sometimes I’m not physically capable to show up. Something that is really hard for me to separate is my productivity from my self-worth. I’ve always thought that if I’m busy and productive, that I am worthy of happiness and all the things that come with it. But that’s not the case. I work hard for everything that I have and I still have anxiety and depression. Others struggle even more than me to the point where their anxiety and depression are crippling and honestly some days mine is crippling to me.
In a world where self-care is the new buzz phrase, I feel that my generation often neglects self-care. Sure millennials are often called selfish and lazy, but there aren’t many millennials I know that aren’t working their asses off to stay ahead. Between my fiance and I, we have five jobs. We are usually both utterly exhausted at the end of the day and rarely have days off and when we do have days off, we are working around the house. As I began writing this, I was going to find some inspirational way to say that all my hard work is paying off. But I’m struggling.
I struggle daily to make time for myself. So I think that my real point of this is to remind myself, and you, to slow down if you need to. If your mind isn’t telling you that you need to, I bet your body is. Don’t give into the expectations and obligations surrounding us as easy as it is to do so. Sit down and take a break or do the dishes that have been piling up in the sink while listening to your favorite podcast. Self-care doesn’t have to be face masks and bath bombs, although those are very nice and I definitely enjoy them when I can. Just listen to what your body and your mind are intuitively telling you and remember to be kind to others and yourself. We are all trying our best.