1. The condition of being transparent.

2. Something I’m not.

At all. I HATE talking about myself and I am terrified of being open. This is a blessing and a curse. A blessing in that people think you are a great listener!A curse in that nobody ever gets to know you. I hide behind my listening skills quite well. If I can listen to what you have to say, I never have to tell you what I have to say. Not bad for friendships. Death kneel for a performer as our job is literally to “connect”.

How many chances in life do you get to have an adventure? To just get up and run like Forrest Gump. To boldly go where no man has gone before? At 35 yrs old, those chances become fewer and at a much higher risk. I’ve built up so much social capital (friends, work, church, family, etc.) that every risk I take now, has a higher chance of capital loss. Boldly going anywhere has a great chance of costing everywhere.

And nobody tells you how to be 35 years old. If adulthood had a family, 35 would be the middle child. Awkward. Not as beloved as his younger siblings 16 and 21. Not as revered as 25 and 30. Not as honored as 40, 50, and 60. You are old enough that some circles will stay say “aaaaaw you’re a baby” and other circles will say “MAN! I didn’t realize you were that old!”

I wanted to take control of 35. I wanted to go on an adventure and this is it.

I saw a video of R. Kelly singing his life on GQ’s internet magazine. He sung for 46 minutes. I watched it 3 times and I laughed harder and harder every time. It was ridiculous. It was simple. It was entertaining. While watching for the 4th time it hit me.

“I SHOULD DO THAT! I should sing about my life as an R.Kelly character!”

Now there are obvious limitations. I can’t sing, and I hate talking about myself. But sometimes you just have to put your shoes on, run, and boldly go.

So, for my 35th birthday I decided to sing about my life in comedy. I gave myself 2 rules.

1. Talk about yourself

2. Be entertaining for 35 minutes straight.

Really risk it. No edits. No redo’s. As a creator of things, it’s tough because you want everything you put out to be perfect. This adventure is as much about pushing myself for 35 minutes as it is getting over perfect creations.

So, here it is. This thing I’ve made. My adventure. This will either be your new favorite thing, or the dumbest thing you’ve ever seen. I’m prepared for both. If enough people are into me (as R. Kelly) talking about my life, I will do more (much shorter) versions and stories like this.

If you love it or can’t make it past 2:00 minutes…thank you for taking this adventure with me. Here’s hoping we can go on more adventures together.

Welcome to 35. Let’s get weird.

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