Acceptance – The best quotes about acceptance came from Michael J. Fox. “Acceptance does not mean resignation, it is understanding something is what it is and there has got to be a way through it.”
Understanding Parkinson’s disease and how it affected Michael J. Fox, he knew that he could not control the disease. I witnessed this with my mom who passed away eventually because of Parkinson’s disease, but acceptance does not only have to do with death and illness.
Acceptance really has to do with pride. We stay at the center of our universe so much. Planning and pushing ourselves, making decisions that not only affect us but also those around us, it gives us an illusion of control at times. There are statistics based on whether a plan is written down or not how successful it will be, this gives credibility that we can influence outcomes. Think about it, if you write down the goal, and then put in the work, isn’t it likely that you will achieve it? Of course, and this is control; self-control. The same is said for leadership and for business planning, there is also emotional intelligence out there to predictively index outcomes from the emotional level. I have been also been doing a lot of work on Emotional Mapping which goes a step beyond what has been written about emotional intelligence and is a science of understanding pushing through to a more virtuous life which has huge implications in all aspects of life.
But control is an illusion.
Pride is not part of the virtuous life forces that we are striving for, so if you can understand that planning has to do with control there seems to be a paradox. This is where acceptance comes in. Acceptance is the knowledge and the understanding that there is much that we can not control. If there is 99.9% chance that you would win the lottery, would you buy a ticket? Sure! What about at a 50% chance of winning? What about a 20%? At what level do you stop thinking it is acceptable or not acceptable to try to win the lottery?
Louisville, KY, where I live, is home to the Kentucky Derby. The largest gathering of optimistic people I know. I say this because a pessimist would not go up to the betting window and put any money down on a horse would they? (Well maybe they would, but just not take the ticket, because they wouldn’t think they would win anyway…. Or would they hold out for a little HOPE?) Knowing that there is a chance for both winning and losing is more of a realist point of view; but an optimist plays with thoughts of what they would do if their horse came in.
After the horses have crossed the finish line, you are left elated or letdown, and acceptance kicks in. See acceptance is tied to patience and hope and to the fact that we are still alive; still breathing. Things don’t go according to plan, relationships fall apart, deals fall through, the product did not work as advertised. Sometimes our hopes are diminished, which creates a downward movement of our energies. Acceptance allows us to put on the brakes for a moment and gives us the time to re-evaluate and find the way to get through to the next level.
Acceptance is not losing hope, it is stopping for a moment and allowing faith to be present again in our life. Faith that there can be more, that their can be a positive, that there is still a positive direction in the face of a set back.
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Let the moment of acceptance of where you are, allow you to PUSH on to where you want to be, it is a place to dig in, to create new momentum.