Wow! Have you ever looked back over a week and thought, how did I make it through all of that? It feels like I’ve had one of those weeks for the last three weeks. It’s not that things were so bad, it’s just that they’ve been so super busy, crammed and hectic that I feel like I’m on constant auto pilot. But, there have been some pretty awesome moments tucked into these weeks too, like my son qualifying for the history bee or my daughter making two goals in her field hockey game. But, through it all, nothing has compared to our quality chats on our morning commute in what I like to call the “car of confidence.”
In the car of confidence, the kids can share their thoughts, ideas, goals, fears, crushes and deepest secrets. There is no judgment, there is no reprisal and most importantly, there is no mention of it again (by me) unless they want to talk about it. What makes it great is that we have a two way street and I also get to share my ideas and experiences that may be relatable to their situation. This is a time for us to all stay connected and grow through sharing. The car of confidence has been a source of encouragement for them, inspiration for me and laughs all around. I can’t tell you how much I enjoy this time with two of my most favorite people, even in the midst of chaos at every turn.
So one of my favorite moments in the car of confidence was when my daughter was sharing how nervous she was to debate in the tournament. She was stressing because she had a new partner and they were competing against high school students. She and her partner were still trying to mesh and she wanted to WIN. Yes, I told her I was proud of her for even trying and that this was going to be a good learning experience. I reminded her that she has been doing this for a long time and just because they were older didn’t mean that they were better at researching, organizing or speaking. We talked about the issues and how she could prepare. But, of course, the fear of the unknown was still terrifying her. But just like we were in the movies, when the music starts to play, we realized that one of our favorite songs was playing in the background.
And, just like that, the car of confidence became the disco of confidence as Justin Timberlake blessed us with the soundtrack that would make everything o.k. The Trolls soundtrack was playing and Justin Timberlake boldly sang, “Can’t Stop The Feeling!” The energy and the lyrics had us all singing…”I’ve got that sunshine in my pocket, I’ve got that good soul in my feet…” Fast forward to the day of the debate and she is still a ball of nerves. But, after round two I noticed a shift.
After the round, she comes to me and is smiling and excited even. I asked her how it went and she says that when she started feeling nervous she thought about “that sunshine in her pocket…” She said that she just felt really good and confident and she had even stumped them in the crossfire. She exuded confidence, she exuded enthusiasm and she exuded sunshine. Regardless of the scores and the outcome, I was so proud of her and that she had found a bit of sunshine to help get her through. By the way, she did well. She won some and she lost some, but overall, her scores were outstanding.
The car of confidence and her trusted tribe within it had given her the tools to go out and live her best life. Never underestimate the power of having a tribe with whom you can trust to share your thoughts and feelings. And never underestimate the power of music to propel you through the most trying times. What’s your soundtrack and who’s your tribe? Keep singing and dancing through this adventurous journey called life!